Love

My social anxiety got the best of me last night. And I pent the majority of the night standing in the middle of a room/field with my mouth open, too inebriated to watch around me.

But everyone was whispering, and not with me.
And everybody was laughing, but not with me.
Everything was happening, but I wasn't there.

And I came to realize that all the issues I thought I had were really there.

I cover it up with a cocky attitude, and brush it under my carpet. But I can't hide what I'm feeling anymore.

I am lonely, and its a feeling that will never go away. I am sad, and for no given reason. Other than I make myself lonely, I make myself sad. I wouldn't be happy if I wasn't depressed.

I make all of my problems for myself.

But I've had enough of that. I'm through being my own worst enemy, and I'm especially through being lonely.

I'm ready to love.